It all started so innocently.

When I was 8 years old I found someone's discarded stocking in the woods and I tried it on. The feeling fascinated me but I vowed never to do it again.

A year later I started trying my mother's pantyhose. My first orgasm happened while I was wearing white pantyhose with a lacy French cut and black pumps with bows on the vamp.

I stopped for a while in college, but in my mid-20s I started again. I also started doing cybersex with other guys looking for 'girls' like me.

In 2006 I started sucking dick. It freaked me out at first, but I quickly learned to enjoy it, including the salty taste of precum just before a man bursts.

Now I can't get enough cock in my mouth or ass. The only sex I have had has been with other men, I have always been dressed like a girl, and I have always been a bottom.

I no longer fantasize about women at all, only about dressing like them and pleasing men. My latest fantasy is for a stud to make me dinner, to get drunk with him on wine, to start kissing and cuddling, and then for him slide my miniskirt up, my pantyhose down, and to start groping me and fucking me as I submit to his every sexual whim.

The word sissy should have a picture of me next to it in the dictionary, all dolled up. I'm gay, but there's more to it than that.

As I look down at the pantyhose on my legs and the high heels on my feet, I realize that sexually, I have totally failed as a man. And I love it! I want to meet a man I can be with and be his 'girl.'