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  • — Out of the Closet —
    Posted by Anonymous

    And I am, for the most part, a dog lover. Okay, I love big dogs. I don't like little, yippy, rat fink dogs. Except Jack Russell Terriers. Those are the only litte dogs I like.

    I have always hated her dog, I will never love her dog. She thinks I have loved and cared for that piece of shit and I never have.

    He stinks, he is annoying, he can't heel, he jumps all over the sofa, he begs at the table, he eats my other dogs' food, he has snatched a cookie out of my kid's hand, drawing blood in the process, and he doesn't respect the chain of command, which in dog world means you heel to the Alpha, which is my female dog.

    Of course, my female dog tries to reinforce her authority by kicking the shit out of my sister's dog on more than one occasion.

    All the while, I pretend to my sister that I'm doing everything I can to keep these dogs apart. But right before I kicked that mutt out of the house, my female dog got into it yet again with my sister's dog, and you know what, I didn't jump immediately to his defense. I really just let my dog have at it for a good five minutes, while I went to get the hose from the reel at the side of the house, walked around to the backyard, where I then proceeded to squirt my dog with the nozzle on "Jet Stream."

    My sister's dog gets a nasty infection that weekend. He lies (lays?) listlessly around the house, and I just wish him dead. Of course, my conscience gets the better of me, and Sunday night, I take the dog to the animal hospital, where he must be repaired and medicated to the tune of $350.00, which I pay for because by now, I feel really really bad.

    But not so bad that when my sister comes back from her ski trip, I tell her the mutt must go.

    He did. Now there is peace and tranquility in my home.

    #1122 — Comments (3) — Mar 1, 2001 at 12:54 AM — That's Juicy! (0) Remove It.
  • 1
    You sister's-dog-hating bastard.
    3/17/01
  • 2
    HA HA HA DITTO
    5/9/01
  • 3
    Wait, you guys, this is exactly the point of anonymous confessions! I thought this was one of the best confessions, because he never told her how much he hated that dog. And he never told her that he almost got the dog killed.

    Down with stinky, stupid, rat-fink dogs that get treated like humans!
    10/8/01




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