• Adult Confessions
    — Embarrassing Moments —
    I'm a 30-something female and I'm an alcoholic but always drink at home and alone, have for years and even more so after one of my sisters died suddenly last year. I don't drink in public b/c I learned years ago that when I drink too much in public I act like a giant idiot. At home, I'm If I didn't know my death would destroy my parents and other sister after losing my older sister last year, I'd kill myself. At home when I drink I'm just alone and quiet and watch tv or read or surf the net, in public I get loud and stupid.

    Well, I forgot my little resolution to drink only at home last weekend and got hammered at a work event and embarrassed myself and my employer in front of clients. I worked really hard to put this event together, 5 months of work, and then I ruined everything.

    I've been put in corrective action and on paid leave until a decision is made about me...I think I'm going to lose my job. I haven't told anyone except my surviving sibling and she's trying to help me figure out how to save my job, offer to go into alcohol treatment and do any and everything my employer asks me to do so I don't get fired.

    Thing is, the idea of stopping drinking scares me even more than being fired. I know I'm sick, I just don't know if I can stop.
    #1507 — Comments (5) — 10/3/2009 at 10:11 PM — That's Juicy! (0) — That's Lame. (0)
  • 1
    once a drunk always a drunk.
    10/4/09
  • 2
    I understand why you don't want to drink in public but shutting people out in favour of drink no solution, it's likely to lead to a vicious cycle of loneliness, depression and self annihilation.

    It sounds like this has gone on for a long time and it's become a serious problem. Ignore the last poster, you can change and hopefully you won't have to hit rock bottom before you realise this.

    You just need to find someone to help you work through the grief and what ever problem it is that's causing you to turn to drink, consoling might help and you should definitely take any health programs offered.

    Face up to the problem, just because your behaviour whilst at home appears normal on a superficial level doesn't mean it's any better then the way you behaved whilst drunk in public; your hurting you self just as much as you were letting down your work colleges.

    You owe it to yourself to try stop the cycle. Hold on to the people that care about you, it's them you should be depending on not drink.
    10/5/09
  • 3
    I haven't been sober at work in over a year. What's the point?
    10/5/09
  • 4
    I like drunk bitches at work: they always let me fuck their asses.
    10/9/09
  • 5
    You can stop. You will stop when you are sick and tired enough. Life is so much better sober. Had enough? Get help. Good luck to you.
    4/17/11
5500