I never told anyone about the years I spent when my mother married Brian when I was 10 years old. They lived together when I was 9 and things got so intimate and secretive with me and Brian up until I was 14. Thats when they broke up and got divorced, and I never saw Brian after that. My mother died recently and in some ways I wish I had told her what went on but at the same time am glad I never did. I believe I never told anyone because of guilt, embarrassment and possibly even my stupidity and the fact I was so naive I let things continue for years. My mother was a flight attendant and often away for days at a time and even longer for international flights. Even before they married Brian had me convinced it was ok that we saw each other naked and each time promised each other we wouldn't tell my mother about it. She evidently fully trusted Brian to take care of me when she was away and I was perfectly comfortable with him. He spoiled me even before they married and it continued until they broke up. I was never afraid or fearful of him and oddly never felt embarrassed when he did see me naked. I can honestly say during those years I enjoyed it when my mother was away. I do realize now and have for many years known that Brian did a good job of manipulation on me. He had me convinced our closeness (as he put it) was a good thing and not immodest or immoral but a bonding experience bringing us closer together and appreciating each other. It all started with me getting a bath where he would always be present in the bathroom. Naturally I was always naked but Brian would be in underwear. As time went on he introduced me to the shower and thats when the nudity of both of us began. I was probably 10 the first time we both showered together and as time went on we began washing each other and using the hand held shower head to rinse each other. I wasn't stupid at the time and knew what a penis was but I also admit I enjoyed seeing Brian naked. He would soap his entire body and have me use the shower head to rinse him. Thats when I got the best view of his genitals and his anus since he would open his legs wide and turn and bend over as I sprayed the water over him. He did the same for me and always washed my hair the only difference was he also washed my body for me which should have been humiliating but wasn't at all for me. He always got an erection and I did ask him about it in the beginning but all he said was it was a man thing. Many months went by before he began masturbating in front of me and was bold enough to tell me watch him which again I liked seeing him do. I'm not sure how old I was but when he washed me he began spending much more time washing between my legs and started just using his soapy hands rather than a wash cloth. It was the beginning of my sexual feelings and even though I didn't have orgasms at first was still pleasurable to me. Months again went by and I continued watching him masturbate and he washing me. All the sudden it became mutual masturbation until I was a little over 14 and to my utter astonishment he and my mother parted ways. The incredible thing is that I not only never told anyone but I missed Brian for a long time.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Feb 8, 2017 at 12:21 PM

It's time you considered a possible/probable reality to this if you haven't. The decedent, being able to faithfully trust Brian, may have been privy to most of Brian's & your activities. Moreover, Brian could easily have fooled you into being secretive regarding your harmless, intimate activities while informing your mom of the progress. He DID NOT manipulate you as a girl. Your actions together with him admittedly resulted in your close bond with him. Even if he had initiated you into some sexual relations such as sucking his Penis, it would have only strengthened your bond. When one gives it rational thought, it's elementary to presume why Brian & your dead mother parted ways ; she knew that left with you alone further at your ripe age, nature would take its course at the fault of no one & she was correct. As such, it was better to split with Brian cleanly than have to navigate the further complex baggage that would have ensued. She was also keen to your emotions then & knew it would be harder for you to recover if the total relationship continued.

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