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  • — My Cheating Heart —
    Posted by Anonymous

    Okay, here's the laundry list of my cheating...

    one nighter #1: drunken night with a stranger
    one nighter #2: man 15 years older than me at a convention in PA
    short-term affair: met this guy at a karaoke bar, he was the best kisser I'd ever met, so I figured he'd be good at other things. This went on for an entire summer
    internet guy #1: this guy and I had cybersex several times, then agreed. We had sex in the front seat of his car in the Target parking lot in broad daylight. He had a great "unit," but he was a true "quickie"
    the security guy: I was working temp work and met a relatively cute guy who was working security. we got drunk together and had sex all night long.
    the guy who taught this class I attended: he was very sexy, bald but sexy. he came into town a year later and we hooked up. never heard from him again.
    my manager: I'd just started working for a very large company and had a very HOT boss. He and I hooked up after a concert one night.
    the really hot local politico: hooked up with someone in my local liberal party. single, good-looking... would definitely do him again
    my sister's 18-year old guy friend: total drunken 1-nighter. only made out.. didn't have sex.
    a really old local politico: a total drunken 1-nighter. again, only made out. no sex. good thing. I had on my beer goggles that night.
    at least 5 or 6 drunken 1-nighters when out with my best friend.
    a hot & heavy make-out session with a guy that I work with (no, not the manager)
    had sex with my best friend. HUGE mistake. broke both our hearts.
    got really drunk one night and had sex with this guy in his car in the parking lot of a local pub

    I need attention from men. I'm not sure what my deal is, but whenever a guy pays attention to me, compliments me, or makes sexual advances toward me, I am powerless to resist. I think I am a sexual addict. I feel that I am doomed to ruin my life. How do I stop this?

    #966 — Comments (10) — May 13, 2001 at 8:09 PM — That's Juicy! (19) Remove It.
  • 1
    I'm not totally convinced that you are a sex addict. But I know nothing of the subject. One thing I think is clear is that you cannot hold your liquor! Sounds like all someone need to fuck you is a glass of booze and an attentive eye. I say, cut back on the drink and stay sober enough that you can make more wise choices about who you let get into your pants.
  • 2
    Perhaps you are correct about the booze. I never could hold my liquor, not even in college. I guess in the back of my mind I still have this teenage girl thought that if I put out, he'll stick around. (whomever HE is)

    I really want a lasting relationship, a love strong enough to last forever. I guess the drinking and sleeping around is an easy way to get at least part of what I'm looking for.
  • 3
    A. Stop drinking

    B. Get therapy

    I don't deny the allure and excitement that comes along with each new sexual escapade. It is very very potent. But somewhere along the line, you've got to believe you are worth more than just a one night fling. But only if that's what you want. I know some people who just want sex, and lots of it, and it has nothing to do with self-esteem or lack thereof. Maybe you're one of them. You should find out.
  • 4
    I agree ... if you're looking for a long-lasting relationship, the guys who want the same already see you as a drunken slut. The guys who want drunken sluts are drawn to you, and those are the ones you're having "relationships" with. If you want the other kind of guy, stop setting yourself up to fail.
  • 5
    It is difficult, however nothing is impossible.
    You just have to slow down and refuse once in a while.
    Like quitting smoking.You smoke one less cigarret everyday and soon you will like it less.
    With sex eventually you will hook up with one guy that will make you enjoy it with him.
  • 6
    Dear too much, You sure do sound like a sex addict and you should look for SLAA (Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous) meetings in your area. It really does help to talk to people that are going through the same thing that you are. Good Luck...
  • 7
    I have the same problem - and I know that I am really looking for the man who will love me AND keep the sex interesting, exciting and a little mysterious. You can find it; they are out there. However, you won't find it by giving it up to whoever catches your eye, especially not when you're drinking, because your judgement is impaired at those times.

    It's hard, but you can tell yourself, "I am worth a quality guy and a high-quality relationship. I am going to get an exciting, totally HOT guy that respects me." If you decide that that's what you want, you start to filter out the guys who'll do it with you in a car in the parking lot - and you'll start to turn your attention to guys who can fit the bill a little better.

    Remember that to get a guy that respects you, you have to give the relationship some time before jumping in bed (or wherever). It's a proven fact. So make the next HOT guy wait while you get to know each other. If he's interested in the relationship as well as the sex, then he'll wait.

    Also, guys like confident women - not just confident in their sexuality, but in other areas as well. You may want to think about your other good qualities and start flaunting those a little. A confident woman is very attractive. If you don't feel like you have so many great qualities, you can develop them. Learn to do something new and fun. Anything you want. That gives you more confidence outside of the bed, which makes you more appealing out of the bed.

    And you can learn to put yourself first. It may seem like you are putting yourself first by getting all the sex you want, but you are not really, because your true needs are getting that loving relationship with the hot guy, not just the sex. Putting yourself first means not just doing it because some guy offered (or you seduced him); it means thinking about what steps you need to take to get the relationship, too. Don't forget about making him wait while you get to know each other.

    Good luck!

  • 8
    Don't stop! We need more women like you! Guys hook up for pleasure and it's OK. Who says you can't fuck guys anytime you want. I hope I run into you sometime and you can take advantage of me too. ;)
  • 9
    You are not a sex addict. What you have is low self-esteem. You want attention and figure that that is the only way to get it. If this is the case, you are definately wrong! You do not need that type of attention. All that does is keep reaffirming to yourself that you have no other way to get someone to love you. Stop the cycle and go get help.
  • 10

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