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Adult Confessions | My-family |
My Family
Who doesn't have an Uncle Bubba, with the beer belly and obnoxious belching, or the Aunt Petunia with the bright red lipstick and too-tight pants? We all have at least one person in the family tree we'd all wish would be plucked.

This category is for all those stories about loud aunts, drunk brothers, slutty sisters, and flatulent uncles. If your relatives would make a good comedy routine, then we want to hear about them.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    I'm 14. My cousin who is also 14 came to live with us this summer when we moved here in July. It was just supposed to be for the summer. But now his parents are getting divorced. And my mom says my aunt will probably end up in a mental hospital from the stress. So my mome went to the high school today to enroll my cousin. She even asked to put him in all the same classes as me. Except gym (because girls and boys are separate) and band. He wanted to be in band and I want to do Advanced Cheer & Pom.

    Anyway, he is weird. He looks normal, even hot (kinda like Freddy Prinze, Jr.). But he acts creepy and is all into the Lord of the Rings and swords. He doesn't try to talk to any girls at all. But I don't think he is gay because he has all these drawings of elf girls and princesses around his room. What can I do?
    I want him to be more normal because I have been looking forward to high school my whole life. When people find out he is my cousin, no one will like me.

    #3213 — Comments (6) — Jan 31, 2005 at 2:16 PM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    I've got this step kid that came with his mom when I married her, I adopted him when he was just over a year old. I thought it would work, but him and his mother, and her folks wouldn't let it, they made my life a living hell, he moved in with his grand folks when he was 14, that was 24 years ago, and that was the happist day of my life. His mom left me shortly after that and I havn't missed him or her once. In the last few years he has caused trouble between me and the two kids that her and I had, what would bring me pleasure now is to pick up the paper and read where he had been hit by a mack truck.

    #3327 — Comments (4) — Jan 8, 2005 at 4:34 AM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    A couple of years ago now me and my sister were out shopping and we always used to play tricks on each other so we were walking through this shop and slowly from behind I lifted her skirt up so everyone could see her knickers. This as you can imagine annoyed her but she didn't do anything, which I thought was strange. Later on we separated when I looked at cars and she at perfume. The all of a sudden she came up behind me and whispered in my ear "REVENGE" and before I had any chance to move she yanked my shorts down, and with added bonus for her my boxers as well so I was naked in a shop infront of everyone my balls and penis in public view. I was 12 at the time and she was 14.

    #3304 — Comments (11) — Nov 26, 2004 at 12:46 PM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    I hate my mother, If she dies now I don't think I would miss her that much. She males my life a living HELL!!!

    #3301 — Comments (4) — Nov 12, 2004 at 5:07 PM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    one year i went to my sisters concert. well me and the rest of my family sat down. about 10 minutes in to her concert my littler sister yelled out my sisters when she saw her an stage name so the whole gym could hear. after the concert she told me that she wished she couldve melted into the floor.

    #3297 — Comments (4) — Oct 27, 2004 at 10:59 PM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    I am expecting a New Year's baby. We've been thrilled except for one issue. I really hate both my last name and my husband's.

    My last name happens to sound a lot like an obsene phrase if you say it too fast. I've suffered years of humiliation as a result. School was hell and even now, as a thirty-year old working in a law firm, co-workers still tease me. My mother admits that it is terrible and that she actually cried when my dad proposed because she knew she'd end up with his name.

    Growing up, I couldn't wait to marry so I could ditch my last name. No such luck. I married a man with a horrible last name. My husband's last name is difficult to spell and pronounce. He also hated it as a child and thought about changing it, but his mother said it would break his father's heart. I kept my horrible maiden name because it seemed senseless to exchange one horrible name for another.

    So here we are with these terrible names and a baby on the way. I got an idea a few weeks ago to let our son (It's a boy acording to the sonogram) have a fresh start with a different last name. We had three first names that we really liked: Alexander, Jackson, and Bailey. At the same time, we couldn't decide whether to use my husband's last name (awful) or a hyphenated combination (worse). So I suggested we give him two as a first and middle name and one as a last name. (We still aren't settled on order). My husband loves this idea.

    I mentioned this plan to my family at Christmas and they were scandalized. My in-laws had a similar reaction. They liked the names, but thought that the baby should have one of our last names.

    Does our plan sound wrong?

    #3278 — Comments (6) — Jun 25, 2004 at 9:35 AM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    I am one of eight kids. When my parents' divorced, my youngest brother was just a freshman in HS. My dad remarried quickly (he was having an affair) and had a new baby eight months later. He moved to his new wife's hometown and wasn't involved in our lives anymore. Mom took the divorce hard and eventually felt she couldn't care for my brother. She asked my older sister to take him in. Sis kept "Chad" a year then kicked him out. He had gotten her 14 year old sister-in-law pregnant. Chad came to live with my older brother and his wife next. Within three months, he inseminated both the 17 year old sister babysitter and her 14 year old little sister. When Chad came to live with me (the last sibling who's married), I explained to him (a father of 3 at age 16) that this was a chance for a fresh start. My husband, the pragmatist, bought a huge supply of condoms and told Chad to use them. Nonetheless, not five months went by before an irate mother called us. Her fifteen year old daughter had had a miscarriage at school and said Chad was the father. He didn't deny it. Unbelievably, he was very upset about not getting to be a father again! He said he makes beautiful babies and always wanted a big family like Dad's. My husband wanted Chad to get a vasectomy, but of course we couldn't force him. So I arranged for him to get counseling instead. He met with our minister twice a week for eight months and really seemed to be improving. Then, to our horror, the minister's 16 year old daughter gave birth to a premature baby. No one even knew that she was pregnant (she hid it under baggy clothing)until she was in labor. The baby was Chad's of course. It turns out he had been sleeping with her since the first month of seeing her dad for counseling. I'd had it and I sent him back to live with Mom. He was gone maybe two weeks when a sixth girl wrote us a letter announcing the birth of Chad's son.
    Chad had 5 children and he's barely 19. He isn't supporting any of these kids. The girls are devastated of course and someday these children will have to walk around our town seeing their own half-brothers and sisters. People joke about our family going on Jerry Springer.

    #3271 — Comments (5) — Jun 11, 2004 at 1:31 PM — That's Juicy! (5) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    My mother just told me she's pregnant again. (I was the youngest, and I have one older brother). The thing is, I think it's my brother's baby. There's no other man in my mother's life, and the other day I walked in and saw my brother rubbing her belly in a kind of possessive way.

    It makes me feel really weird and ashamed.

    #3244 — Comments (22) — May 3, 2004 at 4:02 PM — That's Juicy! (12) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    Mama is stubborn, but I actually love her(Shhh). I love my husband Vint, but I despise my nephew-in-law Bubba, because I want to fuck him, he has such a big bulge...but oh- nevermind about that. That two-timing whore of a woman named Iola is trying to steal my hunk of man-meat..but that's another story. Doesn't my family suck?

    #3237 — Comments (3) — Apr 27, 2004 at 10:33 AM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    My 67 year old mom is spending the nest egg dad left her on a 25 year old she met in yoga class.

    #3212 — Comments (19) — Apr 14, 2004 at 9:22 AM — That's Juicy! (8) Remove This.
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