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Adult Confessions | My-family |
My Family
Who doesn't have an Uncle Bubba, with the beer belly and obnoxious belching, or the Aunt Petunia with the bright red lipstick and too-tight pants? We all have at least one person in the family tree we'd all wish would be plucked.

This category is for all those stories about loud aunts, drunk brothers, slutty sisters, and flatulent uncles. If your relatives would make a good comedy routine, then we want to hear about them.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    I don't have a problem with interracial relationships. In fact, given the light skin and more curly than kinky hair my family has, I'm pretty sure that have some white ancestors. However, my sister's white boyfriend has got to go.

    He is what I was raised to never say: "poor white trash". Jake brags that no one in his family has ever graduated from high school. He works maybe seven weeks out of the year at a real job and the last time he was fired for being drunk at work. The rest of the time does odd jobs that are really hobbies like being a guide for rich hunters. He has four children by three different women and doesn't pay child support for any of them. When our family visits, he sits around in just jeans and talks about how his great-granddaddy was a slaveowner.

    My sister is a college graduate. She has a good job and owns the house that she and Jake live in. She's attractive and has a great personality. Before she got involved with him, she was engaged to a great guy from church. Now I'm afraid that eligible well-off black men won't want to be with her. She says she loves him and is willing to put up with his crap because he's just ignorant.

    How can I get rid of him?

    #3217 — Comments (7) — Feb 18, 2005 at 9:50 AM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    I just got out of rehab. My sponser says that I should tell people I hurt that I am sorry, but I've found it really difficult. The worst thing is that I am pretty sure that I was the one who destroyed my parents' wedding photos (cut up and burned). I say pretty sure because it happened during a long weekend when my parents were away. I had two parties and the house got really trashed. My neighbor called my mom's cell phone and told her that I was having parties. My mom called me and said I was grounded. I got pissed and got drunk. I don't remember all that I did between then and my parents coming home. So I don't know if I did it or someone else did at during one of the parties. What should I do?

    #3216 — Comments (6) — Feb 5, 2005 at 3:03 PM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    My sis only eats white foods: rice, fish, cream cheese. What the fuck?

    #3215 — Comments (1) — Feb 4, 2005 at 8:22 PM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    My dad died 10 years ago and my mom had been married and divorced 2x since then. Now she wants to marry "Arnie", her 24 year old gay next-door neighbor.

    She says she knows Arnie is gay (how could she not when he lived with another guy for the last 5 years and had loud gay parties every weekend!) but that they love each other and want to be together forever.

    I asked her if she and Arnie have sex. She said not yet that they didn't need it right now. She said that in the future, they might. Meanwhile, they are happy with kissing, hlding hands, and snuggling naked.

    I'm horrified! I can't believe that she is foolish enough to believe that Arnie is in love with a 55 year old overweight woman. He must want her money.

    #3214 — Comments (4) — Feb 3, 2005 at 2:09 PM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    I'm 14. My cousin who is also 14 came to live with us this summer when we moved here in July. It was just supposed to be for the summer. But now his parents are getting divorced. And my mom says my aunt will probably end up in a mental hospital from the stress. So my mome went to the high school today to enroll my cousin. She even asked to put him in all the same classes as me. Except gym (because girls and boys are separate) and band. He wanted to be in band and I want to do Advanced Cheer & Pom.

    Anyway, he is weird. He looks normal, even hot (kinda like Freddy Prinze, Jr.). But he acts creepy and is all into the Lord of the Rings and swords. He doesn't try to talk to any girls at all. But I don't think he is gay because he has all these drawings of elf girls and princesses around his room. What can I do?
    I want him to be more normal because I have been looking forward to high school my whole life. When people find out he is my cousin, no one will like me.

    #3213 — Comments (6) — Jan 31, 2005 at 2:16 PM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    I've got this step kid that came with his mom when I married her, I adopted him when he was just over a year old. I thought it would work, but him and his mother, and her folks wouldn't let it, they made my life a living hell, he moved in with his grand folks when he was 14, that was 24 years ago, and that was the happist day of my life. His mom left me shortly after that and I havn't missed him or her once. In the last few years he has caused trouble between me and the two kids that her and I had, what would bring me pleasure now is to pick up the paper and read where he had been hit by a mack truck.

    #3327 — Comments (4) — Jan 8, 2005 at 4:34 AM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    A couple of years ago now me and my sister were out shopping and we always used to play tricks on each other so we were walking through this shop and slowly from behind I lifted her skirt up so everyone could see her knickers. This as you can imagine annoyed her but she didn't do anything, which I thought was strange. Later on we separated when I looked at cars and she at perfume. The all of a sudden she came up behind me and whispered in my ear "REVENGE" and before I had any chance to move she yanked my shorts down, and with added bonus for her my boxers as well so I was naked in a shop infront of everyone my balls and penis in public view. I was 12 at the time and she was 14.

    #3304 — Comments (11) — Nov 26, 2004 at 12:46 PM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    I hate my mother, If she dies now I don't think I would miss her that much. She males my life a living HELL!!!

    #3301 — Comments (4) — Nov 12, 2004 at 5:07 PM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    one year i went to my sisters concert. well me and the rest of my family sat down. about 10 minutes in to her concert my littler sister yelled out my sisters when she saw her an stage name so the whole gym could hear. after the concert she told me that she wished she couldve melted into the floor.

    #3297 — Comments (4) — Oct 27, 2004 at 10:59 PM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
  • — My Family —
    Posted by Anonymous

    I am expecting a New Year's baby. We've been thrilled except for one issue. I really hate both my last name and my husband's.

    My last name happens to sound a lot like an obsene phrase if you say it too fast. I've suffered years of humiliation as a result. School was hell and even now, as a thirty-year old working in a law firm, co-workers still tease me. My mother admits that it is terrible and that she actually cried when my dad proposed because she knew she'd end up with his name.

    Growing up, I couldn't wait to marry so I could ditch my last name. No such luck. I married a man with a horrible last name. My husband's last name is difficult to spell and pronounce. He also hated it as a child and thought about changing it, but his mother said it would break his father's heart. I kept my horrible maiden name because it seemed senseless to exchange one horrible name for another.

    So here we are with these terrible names and a baby on the way. I got an idea a few weeks ago to let our son (It's a boy acording to the sonogram) have a fresh start with a different last name. We had three first names that we really liked: Alexander, Jackson, and Bailey. At the same time, we couldn't decide whether to use my husband's last name (awful) or a hyphenated combination (worse). So I suggested we give him two as a first and middle name and one as a last name. (We still aren't settled on order). My husband loves this idea.

    I mentioned this plan to my family at Christmas and they were scandalized. My in-laws had a similar reaction. They liked the names, but thought that the baby should have one of our last names.

    Does our plan sound wrong?

    #3278 — Comments (6) — Jun 25, 2004 at 9:35 AM — That's Juicy! (2) Remove This.
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